HIV-Negative: How the Uninfected Are Affected by AIDS
Copyright 1995 by William I. Johnston
New York: Insight Books-Plenum Press

Contents

    Foreword  Witnessing the Epidemic  Eric Rofes

    Prologue  Boccaccio's Lesson  Giovanni Boccaccio

Introduction  Climbing to Angels Landing

              The Gravity of HIV Infection
              The Position of the HIV-Negative
              Neglecting the HIV-Negative
              Addressing the HIV-Negative
              Scope of the Interviews
              Interview Sources
              Audience
              Returning from Angels Landing

   Chapter 1  A Stranger Comes to Town  Anthony Tommasini

   Chapter 2  Like Ripping a Bandage Off  Sandro Costa

   Chapter 3  Before the Test

              Got AIDS Yet?
              Searching for Symptoms
              Inventing Safer Sex
              Fearing Being Infectious
              Bad Blood
              Precious Bodily Fluids
              Inventing Unsafe Sex
              Standing before the Test

   Chapter 4  Something Tremendously Valuable  Robert Newman

   Chapter 5  Considering Testing

              Breaking the Clamshell
              Two Sides of the Paper
              The Early Purpose of Testing
              Fearing a Positive Result
              Fearing a Negative Result
              Fear of Division among Gay Men
              The Value of an Undifferentiated Community

   Chapter 6  Hope Is Victory  Paul Fielding

   Chapter 7  Getting Tested

              The Outside of the Envelope
              Changing Attitudes toward Testing
              Reasons for Getting Tested
              Going for the Test
              Waiting for the Results

   Chapter 8  A Snake in Your Pocket  Claude Dupont

   Chapter 9  Reactions to Testing Negative

              Unexpected News
              Relief
              Elation
              Feeling Lucky
              Disbelief and Doubt
              Survivor's Guilt
              Reluctance to Disclose Negative Results
              Isolation
              Disappointment, Despair, and Depression
              Acceptance

  Chapter 10  A Mark of Intimacy  Sam Pappadopoulos

  Chapter 11  Division by HIV Status

              Dancing with HIV
              AIDS as Other
              The Meanings of HIV Status
              HIV Negativity as Revirginization
              HIV-Negative Seeks Same
              HIV-Positive Seeks Same
              AIDS Apartheid
              The Price of Division
              The Desire to Escape

  Chapter 12  I See Blue Real Blue  Matthew Lasalle

  Chapter 13  Positive-Negative Couples

              Not the Kramdens
              Learning of Mixed HIV Status
              Telling Others
              Having Sex
              Feeling Safe with a Positive Partner
              Thinking about Seroconverting
              Managing a Partner's Illness
              Living in the Present

  Chapter 14  Pillars of Monogamy  Don Willet

  Chapter 15  Negative-Negative Couples

              Find a Nice Negative Boy
              Virtual HIV
              Protected Sex in Negative-Negative Couples
              Unprotected Sex in Negative-Negative Couples
              Cautions against Unprotected Sex
              Protected Sex as War Effort

  Chapter 16  Solid Foods Aren't Good for You  Ryan Joseph

  Chapter 17  Deciding What's Unsafe

              Double Bagging
              Looking for Experts
              The Meanings of Unsafe Sex
              Reasons for Unsafe Sex
              Negotiating Safer Sex
              Balancing Risk and Pleasure

  Chapter 18  My Seed Is in You  Frank Ruggero

  Chapter 19  Retesting and Seroconversion

              A Cat with Nine Lives
              Situational Testing
              Regular Testing
              Chronic Testing
              Helping Chronic Testers
              The Desire to Seroconvert
              The Responsibility to Stay Uninfected
              Nie Wieder Plague
              The Likelihood of Staying Uninfected
              Living with Uncertainty

  Chapter 20  Yeah, Ma, I'm Okay  Nathaniel McNaughton

  Chapter 21  HIV-Negative Identity

              The HIV-Negative Button
              Two T-Shirt Designs
              The Development of HIV-Positive Identity
              The Fragility of HIV-Negative Identity
              The Absence of a Condition
              HIV-Negative Pride

  Chapter 22  We Want Kansas City Trucking  James Douglas

  Chapter 23  "Fog," "Faith," and "Atlantis"  Mark Doty

  Conclusion  Looking to the Future

              Ambivalence about the Future
              Contemplating Fewtopia
              Living in the Present
              Not Wanting to Celebrate
              Envisioning the Future
              Accommodating the Virus
              The Way We Live Now

  Appendix A  Starting an HIV-Negative Support Group

              Origins
              Mission
              Participants
              Format
              Organization
              Ground Rules
              Discussion Topics
              Obstacles
              Outreach
              Impact

  Appendix B  Discussion Questions

              Dealing with Grief and Loss
              Testing Issues
              Attitudes toward Retesting
              HIV and Disclosure
              Being with HIV-Positive Friends and Lovers
              Is It Ever Safe to Have Unprotected Sex?
              Self-Esteem, Substance Use, and Sex
              Times I've Had Unsafe Sex--or Wanted To
              Sex Talk: Learning to Say How and When
              The Role of Our Sexual Fantasies
              Seroconverting
              What's in Our Future?

  Appendix C  Resources

              Telephone Information
              HIV-Negative Support Services
              Newspaper Articles
              Journal and Magazine Articles
              Books

              Notes

              Prologue: Boccaccio's Lesson
              Introduction: Climbing to Angels Landing
              Chapter 5: Considering Testing
              Chapter 9: Reactions to Testing Negative
              Chapter 11: Division by HIV Status
              Chapter 15: Negative-Negative Couples
              Chapter 17: Deciding What's Unsafe
              Chapter 19: Retesting and Seroconversion
              Chapter 21: HIV-Negative Identity
              Conclusion: Looking to the Future

              Contributors

              About the Author

              Acknowledgments

              Library of Congress Data

              Ordering Information