Newsgroups: alt.religion.kibology From: Matt McIrvin <mmcirvin@world.std.com> Subject: Re: INSTANT REVIEW: Austrian Science Festival User-Agent: MT-NewsWatcher/3.2 (PPC Mac OS X) Date: Mon, 26 Aug 2002 03:31:00 GMT Organization: Matt and Samantha's Festival of Japery
In article <slrnamj5nm.1i0.james@fraktal.localnet>, James Vandenberg <james@vandenberg.dropbear.id.au> wrote:
Personally, I find the Daleks scarier in concept than the Borg.
The Borg are Cybermen.
(The Borg look cooler, but that's because Universal Studios has vast reserves of drug money.) The Daleks are bent on Extermination, whereas the Borg just want assimilation. One supposes that a minority group within the borg, as humans would be, would get a chance to voice it's concerns at a Borg Council meeting. No such luck when your entire civilisation has been destroyed.
A one-act play
[Two DALEKS, the SUPREME DALEK, and DAVROS trundle toward a hot-dog cart.]
I want a hot dog! Yes! [Clenches fist] With a hot dog I shall achieve ultimate having-hot-dog-ness! THE HOT DOG IS TASTY! I SHALL REVEL IN ITS INFINITE TASTINESS! [Screaming] YES! BRING ME A HOT DOG AND I SHALL CONQUER IT! [Flinging spittle] I SHALL CONQUER!!!!
We! Shall! Fulfill! The Wishes! Of! Davros! Our! Creator!
What! Shall! We Do! O Supreme! Dalek!
Purchase! A! Hot Dog!
I! O! Bey!
[DALEK #1 approaches the HOT-DOG VENDOR and waves its plunger in his general direction.]
The Supreme Dalek! Commands! Purchase of! A hot dog! Comply! Or you will be! Exterminated!
[HOT-DOG VENDOR makes a hot dog.]
Two dollars.
I have! No! Two! Dollars!
He! Does not! Give you! The hot dog! He must be! Exterminated!
I! O! Bey!
[DALEK #1 exterminates the HOT-DOG VENDOR. The hot dog is vaporized.]
Dalek! You have failed! You must be! Exterminated!
How can I! Exterminate! If I am! Exterminated!
Exterminate! Exterminate!
[DALEK #2 exterminates DALEK #1.]
You have exterminated! Without command! Of Supreme Dalek! You must be! Exterminated!
WHERE IS MY HOT DOG???!! There are limitless hot dogs contained in the cart! YOU SHALL NOT EXTERMINATE YOUR DALEK! [Waves fist in air] WE MUST FIRST CONTROL THE HOT-DOG CART!!! WITH THIS POWER I SHALL HAVE HOT DOGS!!!!
Davros! Denies! Command! Of Supreme Dalek! Davros! Must! Be! Exterminated!
[DALEK #2 exterminates DAVROS.]
You! Have! Exterminated! The creator! Of all Daleks! You must be! Exterminated!
[SUPREME DALEK exterminates DALEK #2. The explosion splatters a squeeze bottle of ketchup, sending drops of ketchup into the SUPREME DALEK's visual sensors.]
I cannot see! My vision is impaired! I cannot see! My vision is impaired! I cannot see!
[The SUPREME DALEK spins in circles on the sidewalk, falls off the curb, and explodes.]
THE END
-- Matt McIrvin http://world.std.com/~mmcirvin/
Not available in any Usenet group!
[PETER DAVISON runs into frame and mournfully surveys all the carnage, wrecked Daleks, and splattered condiments and Dalek goop.]
[petulantly, into camera] There should have been a better way!
[Frying-egg noise. Main theme and end credits.]
THE END