> Eventually, I came to the conclusion that since I wasn't able to do
> anything effective, and the situation was adversely affecting my personal
> life and my ability to study, I should resign. Having taken control and
> done so, I am now a much happier person, and seem to have regained the
> ability to focus on things. Of course that still leaves the rest of them
> stuck....
Alison.
Thank you very much for the honesty and clarity of your description.
Yes, I have had such experiences in which other persons with depression
were involved. From the incedence of these experiences I suspect that an
astounding fraction of people suffers from depression. I think it is a
very important problem which has to be solved in a sensible manner! Once
we know the problem and its solution, we can try to prevent it from
occuring in a learning organisation.
I also had experiences with myself. But how could one resign from oneself?
By taking drugs? Is there a difference between hard drugs like cocaine and
soft drugs like marijuana, including the anti-depressants?
I remember many dark hours of depression, drawing me into a black hole
from which no escape seems to be possible. Until one day.
I was depressed so much that I could even be used as an anchor for black
holes. I switched on the turntable with a record on it, not noticing its
contents. Then I went to lay down on the floor to sank into the bottemless
pit of desolation. Ten minutes later I discovered that I was recovering
while listening to Beethoven's violin concerto. My depression was
vapourising like water in the sun. This never happened before. I was so
happy.
Afterwards I used this remedy many times, always with success. Then I
began to wonder. Why did it work? Surely, Beethoven's violin concereto
will not work with other persons, nor will any type of music work with
others. I began to notice that this concerto helped me to 'regain my
creativity'. I began to experiment with other music. Rachmaninoff's second
piano concerto also worked. Later on I noticed that as soon as my
environment 'degraded my creativity', for example by trying to conform me,
it triggered my depression. I then tried to get rid of my depression by
doing something creative under the circumstances. It worked. The violin
and piano concertos were not needed any more. Eventually I realised that
it was specifically emergent creations which saved me from depression. How
was that possible?
Today I know that emergences have a major influence on the level of
spontaneity. Emergences are the only means available to us to switch from
the nonspontaneous region of spontaneity to its spontaneous region.
I firmly believe in the tenet: to learn is to create. If I
cannot create while I am trying to learn, then I cannot learn.
This means that obstacles to my creativity becomes obstacles to
my learning. After I have discovered that
the degrading of my spontaneity into its nonspontaneous region
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
was the source of my depression, I knew how to handle
my own depression under all sorts of circumstances. I also
understood much better how to guide other people out of their
own miseries. I simply encourage them to create emergently and
then share in their joy.
Maybe my last sentence is the solution to the problem you have
hinted at with
'Of course that still leaves the rest of them stuck...'
Best wishes
--At de Lange Gold Fields Computer Centre for Education University of Pretoria Pretoria, South Africa email: amdelange@gold.up.ac.za
Learning-org -- An Internet Dialog on Learning Organizations For info: <rkarash@karash.com> -or- <http://world.std.com/~lo/>