This is good, I'm glad someone pointed this out...
On Sat, 15 Jun 1996, Dr Ilfryn Price wrote:
> Replying to LO7887 --
> Two sides of the same coin
>
> In LO 7880 Martha told us of being ostracized by managment for breaking
> some rules and creating a different result, e.g.
>
> In LO 7887 Ben described someone who did not fit the norms of his group
>
> It is very easy to sympathise with Martha and agree with Ben, but what we
> are actually seeing here are two sides of one coin and the tendency of any
> group to excommunicate someone who does not think/ act/ conform. We can
> easily get to being not only right but righteous about making the others or
> other wrong which is a block to learning in either case.
>
> THINK ABOUT IT - or is it just me who sees the paradox in these two posts?
I like the comments written in some earlier post about finding a way for
everyone to win. Under the pressure of manipulative management, I try to
help them either see the benefits to themselves, whatever new thing I'm
working with, get them excited by it's nifty-ness, or "help" them to
think it was their idea... (subversive maybe, but effective).
I also strongly agree with some of Rols comments about choosing to ignore
the negativity. I think the role of Personal choice plays a strong part
in this discussion. In my original post about the co-worker who
criticizes management, but defends the system against change agents such
as myself, I failed to emphasize the choice element. My co-worker seems
to have chosen the stance he's taken on, because it is "safe", and gives
him some satisfaction. I on the other hand "choose" not so much to
ignore him, and run him out-as has been suggested, but to pursue a course
that includes many of the LO concepts and also builds any bridges I
might with the intent to "outlast" the negative vibes.
It is very dangerous to cling to our own "rightous" stance in the face of
negative pressure. Who knows, they might be right... or they may see a
flaw in our thinking, and while they are not being very charitable in
how they point it out to you, you might learn something by considering it.
Life is seldom black and white. If we "rightously" stand in our own
council while they "rightously" stand in theirs, all there is - is a
standoff, no one learns a thing, and no progress is achieved. On the
other hand, I'm not advocating giving up the ship. I mean, learn from
them, even if they refuse to learn from you. Gain from the nay-sayers,
because they are People who have experience. if you negate them, you are
assaulting their humanity. Instead, add their experience to yours, and
by the way, you could end up making a friend of them, and such people are
valuable allies, if they are for you.
The big point is, We can choose. I know they won't budge (although some
have and I've celebrated the event) So I have to be the pro-active one. Some
folks get upset when they have to be the one who takes the initiative,
but hey-that's what leadership is all about. Just because you don't wear
the label doesn't mean that you aren't one (in your domain of influence).
So choosing to be charatable towards the obnoxious, the bully and the
beligerent is something we can all do-even when they are not cooperative.
later...
--Michael Erickson <sysengr@atc.boeing.com>
Learning-org -- An Internet Dialog on Learning Organizations For info: <rkarash@karash.com> -or- <http://world.std.com/~lo/>